As Theodore Roosevelt said, “If you’re going to be in the arena, you’re gonna get hit.”

Written 4/2/2025.

Okay, Teddy didn’t actually say this, but it’s implied in his famous “Man in the Arena” speech which he gave at the Sorbonne in Paris on April 23, 1910. He talks about the man whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood (full quote at the end of this).

That’s what I felt like at 9:30 pm when I was in bed and heard someone text me.

It was a link to a Facebook post. I clicked on it only to have the face of my brand manager staring back at me from the “Chicago Mug Shots” page. The next link had the crimes she allegedly committed (theft of services – she didn’t pay people for their work).

I felt like I got a shot straight into my gut. The good news was that I had stopped paying for her services months ago when nothing was being accomplished, and it turns out she probably was using the money I gave her for herself versus paying those she either engaged (contractors) or employed.

Earlier in the day I had contacted the place where my podcast release party was to enquire about using them for my professional association. That’s when they informed me that they hadn’t been paid (my brand manager was the person who was paying for everything and had signed the contracts).

So, after the gut punch, the second thing I did was to pray for her. We all need grace and kindness, even those who lie to our faces. This doesn’t mean that she shouldn’t be prosecuted (if found guilty).

Next was figure out what I learned which was threefold.

First, if a person promises to do something and they don’t, either don’t or stop paying them. I probably paid 3+ months more than I should have.

Second, if contractors suddenly disappear (she used contractors to do the work), reach out to them directly to make sure there wasn’t anything wrong.

Third, think about the karmic value of this. If it’s my karma that’s coming back to me, then by gracefully accepting this, the value is achieved (and is wiped clean). Did I get screwed? Yes, but it’s not dramatically impacting my life (think of it as overpaying). Unlike others who relied on that income, it won’t make me miss a mortgage payment.

Fourth, on a positive note, it really spices up my journey story. I can’t make this shit up. As we go through life, if we are pushing the boundaries, we WILL run up against people who lie and take from us. We WILL run across people who will rip our hearts out and toss our hearts on the floor before stomping on them. It’s a fact of life, that’s actually what we signed up for. To learn and grow.

A monk I knew had a sculpture of a broken pot on his desk. When I asked him about it, he replied that it’s an illustration of the love of God on us. If we were a perfect piece of pottery, there would be a small hole at the top where God’s love/light shines in. If we have been broken, then God’s love/light is able to shine everywhere in our lives. That’s why it’s common to say that God only accepts the broken to be soldiers in His army.

This goes for the other/non-religious too. If life were perfect, our heart would be small and dark. When it is broken, each time it grows back larger and allows us to love our fellow humans more. The kindest person in the world is the one who had the most crap happen to them.

My job in all of this is to use this incident to grow, both personally and professionally. To keep putting myself in the arena to strive valiantly, to spend myself in a worthy cause and if I fail, I fail while daring greatly.

Please join me in the arena. I want to be your biggest cheerleader.

Love,

Robert

MAN IN THE ARENA

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

For the full speech, see https://www.theodorerooseveltcenter.org/Learn-About-TR/TR-Encyclopedia/Culture-and-Society/Man-in-the-Arena.aspx